Dear December,
The dark halls in your mind will brighten again. It is often the evolution of how things go: stages, cycles, progressions. When being honest about feelings, thoughts, and roadblocks, evolution and progression are inevitable — the solace we seek is inevitable.
The spiraling sensation of self-doubt/judgment/loathing is often difficult to pull ourselves out of, asking for a hand to carry the extra weight always seemed simplest. But I get it, the simple tasks can be the most mind-numbing. It takes practice to ask for help; it takes practice to be that person you wanna be, it takes practice to remind ourselves that our evolution is but a choice away.
The Old Testament describes tears as the by-product of when the heart’s material weakens and turns into water. In Ancient Greece, Hippocrates the II, a doctor from Kos, believed the mind was the trigger for tears, but it was in the 1600s that this leading theory was taken as truth; “emotions — especially love — heated the heart, which generated water vapor to cool itself down. The heart vapor would then rise to the head, condense near the eyes, and escape as tears.”
It was in 1662 that Danish scientist Niels Steinsen came to understand that the lacrimal gland was the true origin of tears. today some scientists believe crying is just an identifier of our inability to cope with something, like our tendencies as children.
So, in the cycle of understanding tears, emotions, we can understand that by calling on people, the people who choose to love us, we can begin to cope with that which we are unable to carry alone.
Sometimes it just takes someone pulling you back from the dark halls and helping you find the light. Their voice, their embrace, guide you from depths of despair.
We have come to a point where people love to remind us that we must be able to do it ourselves. I say, do what you can alone, but when it gets to be too much, take a deep breath, and ask for help.
Radical honesty, I believe, is the first step. If someone asks how you are, say “I’M GREAT” or “I’m not good.” Whatever your feelings, honor them — beginning the process of evolutional breakthroughs. Repression only chips at the spirit and sinks you deeper into what you want to get out of.
One of my favorite lines from Invictus by William Henley reads:
“I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul”
The choice and power to make said choices, tapping into whatever it is we need, is well within our ability to do so. Asking for aid is only as hard as we make, picking ourselves up is only as hard as we make it, judging ourselves is only as constant as we make it.
Yours Truly,
January
